Coffee Rhetoric: “Paula’s Best Dish: Southern Fried Racism”
After the National Enquirer broke the story and it was picked up by the national media, the reaction was immediate. Never a crowd to pass up a chance to upend a particularly a hateful moment, ‘Black Twitter’ skewered the Food Network star via a hashtag called #PaulasBestDishes, and then another one called #PaulaDeenApologyBingo . Quite frankly, watching her fumble her way through two public apologies—the first one she scrapped and the other features her making an appeal of forgiveness to Matt Lauer for bailing on an appearance at the last minute— was awkward and painful to watch: painful because both attempts strike me as being disingenuous and was akin to watching an 8-year-old being forced to eat their vegetables.
When a person has spent the bulk of their life wading gleefully in a sea of racist rhetoric with impunity, I imagine suddenly being held accountable for it, in an age where people aren’t standing for it anymore, can prove to be difficult to reconcile.
People Who Hate Philosophy. You know those people that think philosophy is a waste of time because its really ineffectual and impractical but possess only enough intelligence to express it as ‘lol sittin’ in philosophy 101 and ppl r talkin about whether you can kill babies.’ This also applies…
Do you look like this?
No? Didn’t think so.
Cookie Monster is the only one allowed to say “nom” and it’s when he’s eating cookies.
You, on the other hand, shouldn’t say it. Because you’re not Cookie Monster. Or a five year old. You’re a goddamn adult. And if you’re a five year old, get the fuck off the internet: it’s full of things like tubgirl and goatse and you really don’t want any part of that. At least not yet. Wait until your bar/bat mitzvah.
But seriously. Say no to nom and variants (noms, nomming, etc.).
Also “sammich.” It’s a motherfucking sandwich and you are a grown-ass person and know how to use your words.
And that narrative of conservative victimization is the true genius of what Fox News has accomplished: any editorial judgment in news, or schools, or movies that doesn’t favor the conservative view is elitism and is evidence of liberal bias. Whereas any editorial judgment that favors the conservative view is evidence, merely, of fairness — and done to protect them from liberal bias.
And if you criticize Fox for this game, guess what that’s evidence of? How right they are about how persecuted (conservatives are). It is airtighter than an otter’s anus.
|—||JON STEWART, calling out Fox “News,” on The Daily Show (via inothernews)|
Ur is not a word.
Nor is ty, yw, yu, tha, smh, etc.
It’s not that hard to type out “Thank you.” “You’re welcome!”
You’re and your are two different things.
There, their, and they’re. I learned this in first grade.
The letter Q is not the letter G.
Apostrophes, commas, and periods exist…
Here, sing along with this song:
When you reached the chorus, did you also sing the horn part (e.g. “BUM BUM BUM”) and then add in extra words after Neil sings “Good times never seemed so good” (i.e., “so good, so good so good”)?
Callbacks are for the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Not for Neil Fucking Diamond. This is a perfectly great song and you don’t need to ruin it with your stupid callbacks.
Fucking knock it off.
Look at that audience. They don’t sing along. Be like them.
My mother leaving to give birth to my younger brother. And I hated him for a long time.
I no longer hate him. He has turned out all right.
- Sun-dried tomatoes
- Caesar salads
- Raspberry vinaigrettes
If I see these things on your restaurant’s menu, I lose respect for you.
Fucking sourdough. I go to do my grocery shopping at Trader Joe’s (and I kind of hate myself for being so white), and, like, 90% of the artisanal-style breads are sourdough.
Enough already. It is no longer the 1990s. There are other breads than sourdough.
Fuck you, sourdough bread.
You’re doing well.
It’s not butchering the English language is where it’s at.
Ok, total Last Crusade moment here: you have to choose one of the following ways to pronounce the word “insurance.”
One way is right; the other wrong.
So, which will it be?